CRAIG PRODUCTIONS LLC

"There are victories of the soul and spirit. Sometimes, even when you lose, you win."

Elie Wiesel

"How did you do?" That's the question everybody asks, naturally. It's been asked of me all week, more times than I can count and by people I don't even know that I had no idea even knew I was competing. I suppose it would be easy to feel ashamed and tell them how poorly I placed. But the thing is, it wasn't about that for me this year. This year I didn't compete to win, I did it for entirely different reasons and while I'm not happy that I did not look my best and I know I'm capable of coming in much leaner, I'm so happy with what happened to me on the inside.

If you've been reading my blog consistently, you probably remember a post a few months back where I considered not competing this year. I had a heart-to-heart with a good friend and came to the decision not to compete and then a couple days later changed my mind. I've often times second guessed this decision and thought along the way that my friend was right and I shouldn't compete...but I did and I believe everything happens for a reason and I KNOW that I was on that path to the Emerald Cup for a very good reason and it's so easy to see it now in hindsight.

Doing Vancouver was my opportunity to reflect back on everything that had changed for me in the last year. I spent so much of that weekend reflecting and looking back. The weeks between Vancouver and Emerald Cup were about leaving the past behind and looking forward to my amazingly bright future...the Emerald Cup was like a new beginning for me. I was preoccupied with all of the things on my "to do" list for after the Emerald Cup that it made it really challenging for me to focus on my diet and my training and I couldn't wait for the Emerald Cup to come and go so I could get on to the things I was really itching to do.

The actual experience of the Emerald Cup was nothing short of amazing (yeah, you can say I overuse the word but it's MY word and I like it...so...). I feel incredibly blessed to know some really inspiring people...number one on my list...ELAINE CRAIG!! I cannot tell you how many times over the last year Elaine has picked me up and pushed me forward. When I didn't believe in myself, Elaine believed in me. When I thought of settling (in various capacities), Elaine reminded me of who I am, what I am NOT and helped me reset my compass. For all that Elaine has done for me on purely an emotional level, I am truly grateful. I hope everyone is as blessed as I am to have someone as AMAZING as Elaine in their lives.

A few of my other inspiring people...my awesome suit designer and dear friend, Christie Skelton! Another incredible woman who is inspiring and uplifting. Christie is also a mom (although she's got me beat with SIX kids) and been through a divorce, so she always seems to "get" me even when others don't. She made me a new suit this year and what I love most about my suit is not how gorgeous it is but that I know Christie made it for ME and put so much of herself into making it perfect for ME. Christie joined me at the Brown Bag for breakfast on EC morning and it was a great time for me to spend some quiet moments with a good friend before stepping on stage.

Diane Rudholm is another person on my list of amazing, inspiring people who made this experience so great for me. Diane touches everyone she meets - she absolutely radiates everything positive. I am so grateful for her posts on my Facebook to help me keep pushing forward as we prepped for the shows. I also have to put Rose Patterson and Lindsey McFerran on my list because, even though they don't realize it, they pushed me and motivated me and kept me on track and I am so appreciative for their constant and consistent support along my journey. Bren Dixon, my fellow blogger, was also a huge inspiration to me in the final weeks of my contest prep. Always giving me that push I needed and helping me stay focused on my VICTORY! This is a woman on the move, so make sure you follow her blog as she prepares for the 2010 Ironman!!

A few other thank you's...David Patterson, my former coach and mentor. Dave's always been an inspiration to me and a driving force in my contest prep. For everything I've learned from Dave, I am truly grateful. Bill Willyerd from Northwest Competition Color...Bill did my tan for both Vancouver and Emerald Cup. This is one, stand-up guy! Had some issues with my tan in Vancouver and due to the fact Bill wasn't the primary vendor he couldn't get backstage. He overcompensated and took amazing care of me at Emerald Cup and my tan look incredible! In fact, the tan is so good I'm still scrubbing it off...and it's a "one coat". Thank you Bill!! My hair and makeup artist, Rosaline Hampton...this woman can make your average mom of 4 into a rockstar. I love her! I think the "glam session" was my favorite part of getting ready for the show. Now, if only I could have her around every time I'm getting ready for a night out. Thanks Rose! And a couple of my non-competitor friends who deserve a little "shout out": Shaney, thanks for always being in my corner. Butch, thanks for being my "pusher".

While I didn't take first place or even top 5, I don't have any regrets. This year wasn't about winning for me, it was an internal process and during the process, I came out a winner. I came out so much stronger than I ever thought possible. I am grateful to the Craigs for having me blog here as my blogging has reached more people than I ever thought possible. I appreciate all of you who have emailed me, Facebooked me or approached me in person as it inspires me further to know that my writing has touched you. I look back at where I was a year ago today and I am amazed at how far I've come. While I didn't place well, I'm okay with that because this time was about the journey and getting myself mentally and emotionally to a better place. I'm not even close to being the same person I was a year ago and I am so proud about how far I've come and so grateful to all of the people who have helped me along the way because I certainly did not get here on my own. This sport has blessed me in countless ways.

So...I've got my cape. I grew wings. And now...I've got my tiara!

I've got more to share with you, but this post is getting a little long, so I'll come back later and post more. Thanks to all of you who have followed my journey and to all of you who supported me and to all of you who shared parts of yourself with me. I am truly grateful and very blessed.

~Julie~

Fearless, with cape in hand

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