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Hi Everyone! I said I'd blog more often now that the Ironman is close...and here I am again! The Ironman is less than 7 weeks away! Wow, where does the time go?

 

The title of my blog today represents the feelings and emotions that I've been experiencing the last couple of weeks. I know it's a strange title for a blog about bodybuilding, but follow along with me, and hopefully I will enlighten you!

 

Air traffic controllers have a very important job. I don't know much about their job, but I imagine the main goal of an air traffic controller is to bring a plane in for a smooth landing, without any disasters occurring. I was thinking about how my trainer, Dave, is kind of like an air traffic controller. He is directing me each week...what to eat, how much cardio, how to pose, etc., and sitting back, carefully watching me bring my body in. His job is to to pay careful attention to the factors that could potentially be disastrous to me. Since this is his first time coaching me and dialing me in for a competition, there are a lot of unknowns, but he's been doing this for a little while now...lol... so I trust him! I realize that I'm the "Pilot" of this "Plane"...my body,...and I'm listening to Dave bring me in. I have confidence in his abilities to guide me, so that I don't crash land. However, I also realize that I'm the one actually flying the plane, and despite his best guidance, I could still crash the plane if I don't listen to him.

 

I can see the airport from here...the Ironman stage is very near. I can see the lights. I can hear Kim, the MC, announce my name. I can hear my friends, and family, cheering loudly for me! I can see myself onstage doing my mandatories and evening routine...and I can hear Dave's voice in my head saying..."Just do what you need to do each day...and you'll get there".

 

I'm not freaked out anymore about whether or not I'll be onstage. I know I'll be onstage. The question I ask myself each day is "How am I gonna look?" Sometimes I feel as if I'm coming in fast...like a plane that is about to crash...wings tipping side to side and dropping altitude quickly. Everything seems to be going in fast forward for me now. Not only am I shopping, cooking and weighing foods, eating every 3 hours, training and 2 hours of cardio daily...but now I'm practicing posing and my routine. I'm also thinking about all the other "stuff" that competition preparation requires as well. Things like...pre-judging and evening suits, putting together a costume for the evening routine, makeup, nails, jewelry, tan...and I can't forget about the foods to pack, for carbing up on the morning of competition!

 

So, there is a lot of things going on in my little mind these days. I'm questioning whether or not I will have loose skin on my abdomen from losing 85 pounds and counting, or if it will tighten and disappear. I have to deal with the fact that I'm not going to have the super tight skin that the young competitors have. That's ok, for now. I do want my skin to tighten, don't get me wrong...but in some weird way, it's like a badge of honor to me. I went through 2 pregnancies, that gave me my 2 wonderful boys,  and I have won the battle with obesity, after being fat for most of my adult life! That being said...I might have to get a little "Nip tuck" in the future, if the skin continues to hang around! I never in my wildest dreams would've imagined that I'd be living in my body the way it looks and feels today! I still have a lot of work to do however, and each show I do, I'll strive to be better than the time before. (Yes, I want to do more shows...Dave says wait and see how I feel throughout this competition before deciding if I want to compete again or not...but I already know I want to!)

 

Not too many changes in training or nutrition...except for the fact that to get lean, the carbs have to drop a bit. I'm missing my huge bowl of oats...I remember telling Dave a while ago, 3/4 cup of oats was too much..that I felt I didn't need it. What was I thinking?!!! Now, I have to be satisfied with 40 gms...and even that will be cut down more, if not all the way out, I'm sure!

 

At less than 7 weeks out, I'm nervous, excited, scared...but most of all...happy. I really am "Livin' the Dream" that I've dreamed for so long. The end is in sight...but yet it's not the end...it's just the beginning. Yesterday while I was driving, a song by Tim McGraw titled "It's Your Love" came on the radio. A few of the lines in the song jumped out at me and it brought tears to my eyes. The line that meant the most to me is "Who I am now, is who I wanted to be....I'm stronger than ever, I'm happy and free". That pretty much sums it up for me. I believe the best is yet to come.

 

So, as I enter into the final weeks...and knowing it's gonna get harder...much harder, I'm thankful for the many friends that are my support system. I really couldn't, and wouldn't want to do this, without the help and encouragement of so many people. My best friend, Janet, will be loaning me her suits...and sewing my costume. That takes a huge load of stress off me! She's super busy right now, but has agreed to help me out, and I'm forever grateful to her for her help. Dave, Julie and Mark have lead by their example of how a bodybuilder lives each day. They've shown me how to keep focused and stay on task. They are my "Tough love" people that cared enough to set me straight when I got off track. Elaine, Lindsey, Rose, Diane, Zoe, Anastasiya, Kathy and Ursula have supported me and are encouraging me in so many ways... I'm so thankful for each one of these wonderful ladies. 

 

Life is Good...but very busy!

 

Pilots need air traffic controllers to safely land their plane...Competitors have coaches to successfully dial them in for a show! I'm thankful that my coach is there, illuminating my way...

 

Bren